What a weird, awesome, awkward, and epic night. I'm going to let you in on a little secret. If you 'win' a prize at a big event, and the organization you won the prize from calls you incessantly to try to book you in for your prize - the only thing you've won is a sales trap. But hey - I like a challenge and a 'free' meal. Sign me up.
So Luke and I decided to take advantage of my 'prize' Wednesday night. It was a free cooking show and 3 course meal, and one heck of a sales pitch. The minute we walked through the door, they were on us like vultures. We were a little early so no one was awaiting us right away (a disappointment to corporate I'm sure) but they got to us as soon as possible, sat us down front and centre and treated us like gold ... hoping of course that we were made of it and willing to share. Such was not the case, but we enjoy a little pampering so we let them continue.
Sure - crouch down at the table I'm sitting at to make sure I'm above you. Keep getting me to say positive things to make me think that your products are the best things ever. Put me on an exercise machine that requires no exercise and try to convince me that the strange feeling in my legs is from working out and not the onset of nerve damage. I'm a performer, I'll play along. In fact not only will I play along, I'll give all of your other guests the opportunity to sit back and not have to do anything except enjoy their free meal and a bit of entertainment. ... Now that's a WOW!
So we got to enjoy the marvel of this amazing cookware, guaranteed for life, enjoyed our free meal of Chicken Cacciatore, veggies, and a pineapple upside-down cake (I said good-bye to lent for the night ... well I didn't want to be rude). Then it was time for the awkward, "Let's-try-to-get-you-to-commit-to-$2400-cookware-in-one-night" conversation. We knew what was coming and we didn't want to be a-holes so we listened to the pitch a bit longer and gave our polite declines preparing for a bit of a battle. We enjoyed the meal and the entertainment. The least we could do was give the sales rep a bit of a chance to fight through the obstacles we were putting up, but in the end our answer stayed the same. All while this battle of the sale continued, one of the chefs was skulking the halls looking for a troubled salesperson in need of a little help. Enter CHEF WAYNE!
Back story: There were two chefs (and I use that term loosely) running the cooking the show. Chef Ziad - AWESOME. Chef Wayne - SALESMAN. Everything that came out of Chef Wayne's mouth was so disingenuous it just went to show that stereotypes come from somewhere. Throughout the show the Chef's had a competition to see who could get the most "Wow's" as a result of showing off the features of their products. And all of the wow's that Chef Wayne received came after a long pause and were extremely condescending ... I doubt he noticed. On the other hand, Chef Ziad was amazing. Sure he was a salesman too, but he was selling because he believed in the product and its value and the way it could help all of us. Even if he was full of crap, he believed it and therefore made us believe it. He deserved all of his Wows! But Chef Wayne was from Corporate, so this was his territory. We presumed he was there to train all the new staff at the new location on how to sell. Looks like he could use some lessons from Ziad. Ziad would have been hard to say no to. But fortunately for us - ENTER CHEF WAYNE.
Again - crouched down to make us feel more superior, he begins to ask us what our reservations are. We tell him. He asks about our current cookware situation. We tell him (mentioning that a lot of it comes from a competitive source of theirs - partially true but not entirely). He tries to make the competition look bad. We mention it's a personal connection. He backs off a bit. He does his pitch again reminding us of the amazing deals we'd be turning down if we didn't purchase that night. Luke goes into this schpiel about how as a mechanical engineer he needs to put due diligence into making decisions, because if he didn't then there could be major repercussions - and this situation was no different. ... Wayne turns to me. He asks if we liked the products. We said Yes (we actually did, because Ziad did a good job of showing us why they were so great). He asks, "If you could take something home right now for free, would you?" I give him the cockeyed glance and say "If it were absolutely free, sure. But -" "No buts, you just said that if you could take something home for free you would" ... PAUSE My response: "Except that I know it's going to cost me something." The dance continues. A few more back and forths, then finally Wayne says, "I don't want to be rude, but do you two live together?" Pinnacle of the battle right here. "No!" GAME OVER! Wayne stands up to regain some superiority, reminds us about their referral program, and walks out joking "just don't bring any mechanical engineers." Good try, Wayne! Valiant effort but you're just no match for us. But at least you heard someone else's bell ring meaning that someone bought something. So congratulations - the brainwashing sales tactics worked on someone.
Great night! Good food! Cool products. Seriously - if they weren't so overpriced, and you needed to buy the whole set at once, I actually may have bought something. But the sales pitch was a bit much. If I could give them any words of advice, I would tell them to leave Ziad in charge of everything. Seriously - that dude was awesome.
So - if anyone reading this wants a chance at a free cooking show, free 3 course meal, a free $100 gift certificate just for showing up (covering a whopping 10%, if that) and you can even get the biggest sales pitch of your life - well then "Great. I'll have them give you call."
We also "won" this prize but we chose not to attend. There is usually a catch with these things but sometimes they turn out well. A few years ago my hubby and I went to Oahu on vacation where we were approached to attend a timeshare presentation in exchange for luau tickets worth $110 each. I said no so they threw in transportation and $50 cash, and lunch was included during the presentation. Ok, sounds like a deal. We went to a penthouse suite, went through two hours of sales pitch for an expensive timeshare that looked really lovely. The lunch was tasty. They pitched and we declined several times over. Everyone walked away with their dignity intact. All in all, two hours spend for a luau we wanted to go to anyways. The transportation was great too, our bus guide played old school hip hop on is ukulele. He was seriously good! Anyways, that was one good deal on a great Hawaiian vacation.
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